How We Desire [Paperback] Emcke, Carolin

What if desire isn't just about who we want, but how we've learned to want at all? Carolin Emcke — German journalist, philosopher, and one of Europe's sharpest public intellectuals — untangles the intimate politics of longing in this deeply personal yet fiercely analytical memoir. She writes about coming out, about bodies and borders, about the violence of being told your desire is wrong. But this isn't confessional — it's philosophical, pulling apart the social scripts that shape how we love, who we're allowed to want, and what happens when you refuse those scripts. Emcke draws on everything from Judith Butler to her own life as a queer woman navigating visibility and erasure. It's tender without being sentimental, rigorous without being cold. For anyone questioning how much of what we feel is truly ours — and how much is just well-rehearsed obedience.